stuck so fuck (it)

So, my fears have come to fruition. I am stuck in Portland. If Mother Nature cooperates (so far she's been a mega-bitch but I have hope....), I will be on a flight on Christmas Eve Day. Bustin' up in NC like Santa Clause without a sleigh.

So far, I have been attempting to make 'lemonade out of lemons.' It's ended up being more like Mike's Hard Lemonade except not the kind of booze you steal from a bunch of high school kids. Remember Zima? This is very similar to Mike's Hard Lemonade methinks. I think I puked after drinking a few in high school purely from the sugar content alone. Gross.


Anyhoo, I went to my friend Katie's yesterday and we had a super-awesome time. That is, after I had about a 4 hour pity party for myself and complained to everyone I could get on the phone or via text message. Then, I simply started boozing it up. Nothing works better than drowning your sorrows in a bottle of Cabernet..... or Cote Du Rhone.... or some Rum.... or all three works great, too! The night ended with me falling asleep (errr... passing out) on hold with Southwest airlines to see if I could book an earlier flight or just charm my way into standby. I found the phone open on the pillow next to me this morning. 10 points for Rum. 0 points for Naomi.

Katie and I also watched the first few episodes of the new show, "Mad Men." I have to say, I am totally hooked. That show is pretty sweet and I can't wait to see what happens in this virtual world of Manhattan advertisement in the 50's. While at the Meridian (which was packed btw), Katie told this hilarious story about how she somehow manipulated her evil ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend to make out with her ex-boyfriend's sister (neither one of them knew that eacother were related to the boyfriend at the time). Best story of revenge ever!! Too bad Katie was half passed out during all the debauchery...



Wow, I am realizing while writing this what a bunch of drunks our generation is. I think we just like to enjoy ourselves. There is nothing wrong with that! right? right? right? right? right?

Well, two more days to go until I get out of this snow-hell. I think I am good on snow for a long time. Fuck. this. shit. Seriously. So, today I am going to try and be as positive and happy-go-lucky as possible which we all know is an enormous challenge for me as I thrive off of misery and self deprication. Not really but kind of. I think I am going to brave a authentic spaghetti bolognese from an Italian cookbook that my stepmom and I found (which, btw, I will purchasing on my credit card because I am slowly running out of money due to this unexpected weather...). It is going to take about 4 hours to cook this Bolognese!!! Do I have anything better to do? NO!! So why not make a four hour bolognese??

It's really not that bad here. I kid, I kid. I just wanna go home and see my mommy. That's all really. Wish me luck. My negative ass needs it.